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In fact, I believe that a wife should indeed police her husband.
Even men who love their wives are not naturally monogamous.
I would like to start the chat off with the following statement, and then let you ask questions from there.
Monica Lewinsky brings back to our minds the ancient stereotype of the woman as sexual predator.
The same is true when a man says that he isn't as interested in sex as his wife, often he is saying that he is losing interest in his wife.
This is a problem with the marriage, not only with one of them.
Rabbi_Boteach says: Because men have very limited sexual attention spans.
Men are attracted physiologically, while women are attracted psychologically. In the same way that he has his responsibilities, one of hers is to create novelty for him.
In fact, I believe that a wife should indeed police her husband. Host says: What do you mean by "turning a marriage into an illicit affair" and how can couples do this?
In other words, the general approach is that a wife must always remain mysterious and slightly out of her husband's grasp so that he will be slightly jealous.
Jealousy, although at times destructive, is a beneficial and necessary emotion in a marriage when used in proper doses. Why does she have to see he doesn't loose interest?
Rabbi_Boteach says: True, but their novelty comes about vertically, through deeper levels of the male personality. Phantasea says: What if the man and womans sexual IQ are not on the same level, and say the woman wishes more sex in the marriage then she is getting from her husband, then what?
Rabbi_Boteach says: I believe that sexual incompatibility is a myth created by lazy men who don't take the time to stimulate their wives.