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Imagine a club, with no music, no dancing, and no drinks, full of people who have no idea how to approach someone of the opposite sex — appropriately or not.

The recirculated air pumped the aromatic mélange of cologne, perfume, and body odor back into the festering hive of hormones that is the lobby scene.

For this crowd, arrangement through parents is too old school and openly dating is too new school.

The internet hasn’t worked – is anyone really still on Naseeb.com?

Sure, major thinkers, spiritual stalwarts, and community leaders like Tariq Ramadan, Sheikh Hamza Yusuf, and Imam Siraj Wahhaj were there giving lectures, but most of us have been hearing speeches from these luminaries since we were 18. In fact, the registration for women at the matrimonial event was closed a couple weeks prior to ISNA due to too many female attendees.

And, they haven’t helped us with the one thing we care the most about – getting hitched. However, guys could roll up a few minutes before the event and get in.

Long lines of people queued up in the parking lot, waiting for their turn to sit in the same parking lot in which they were standing. If you don’t get the response you want, assume that the lady in front of you may be shy and new at this too.

I’ve heard many things about that place from a lot of DMV (D. If she still doesn’t give you the interaction you’re looking for, then excuse yourself and move on.

Classy.(For the record, when it comes to hookah spots, Steinway Street in Astoria, Queens has it on lock. When in the club scene, you hang with five of your female friends with your backs to everyone else — not returning eye contact nor showcasing a hint of that friendly smile that says “Yes, I would like for you to talk to me.”Put away your i Phone . Drop the poker face and give out a few simple signals, like extended eye contact, a slight smile and ease of conversation. He is a contributor to the anthology “All-American: 45 American Men on Being Muslim.” First image courtesy of

The event is set up like speed dating: You have three minutes to talk to the person in front of you, and then you go to the next one. Yet, she couldn’t say the same about the men in the room.

In those you have to ask yourself:a) Am I attracted to this person? One suitor, upon realizing her profession was medicine with a specialty in kidneys, droned on about his recent kidney surgery. Remember, there is only three minutes to find out about each other — and this guy spent that time doodling out his organs.

Sure, you may already be talking to a cool, attractive person, but, like an obese, pre-diabetic kid in a free candy store, you can’t stop scanning the whole room.

Therefore no one actually holds a meaningful conversation.

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